LFA pt 1 – Pussy Riot

“So Pussy Riot, you are on trial in this totally not biased or corrupt in any way court room, charged with ruining civilisation in its entirety by singing a noisy song near an altar and therefore causing all humanity to regress to the Stone Age. How do you plead?”

“We object to this court, we did nothing wrong, we weren’t disrespectful to anyone but those criminals who have stolen power. Besides, if you try and lock us up we’ll just unleash our Tyrannosaurus Regina.”

“How dare you challenge the authority of this 100% legitimate and not a political sham court. And what do you mean you’ll unleash a Tyrannosaurus Rex?”

“We didn’t say Tyrannosaurus Rex, we said Tyrannosaurus Regina. You know, from the Latin for ‘queen’ not ‘king’. She’s our feminist dinosaur ally and she’s not going to take your shit!”

“Yes! Tyrannosaurus Regina will lead us to freedom across the steppe to our anarchist/feminist/freedom loving allies. Did you see the look on the judge’s face?”

“Before or after Tyrannosaurus Regina ate his gavel and wig?”

Credits:

Pussy Riot – Nadezhda Tolokonnikova, Maria Alyokhina, Yekaterina Samutsevich
Judge – some sexist old tosser with his face in a trough laid on by Putin

“Hello there Pussy Riot. I’ve followed your case and I am impressed with your dedication and courage. We could use someone like you in this team I’m putting together…”

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